Answer Checking

IELTS Academic Task 1: Men and Women travel by Car.

The bar chart shows the estimated percentage of car trips taken by drivers in 2005.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features, and make comparisons where relevant. 

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The chart illustrates changes in the proportion for  of car trips that was were taken by men and women for different purposes in 2005.

Overall, the percentage of women was higher than that of men using their cars for various aims (please specify) in the given period. Rephrase: Overall a greater percentage of women than men use cars for travelling to banks, running errands, visiting friends and shopping.

Both sexes used most of their car trips to work, whereas visiting town hit a low of rate for women as opposed to men. (Data is not number of trips. You can’t say “most of their car trips.”) Let me rephrase: A large percentage of both genders use car to travel to work. 

In term of work, the percentage of car trips used by men above 50% on this, as opposed to approximately 40% for women. (Not in terms of word, dear. Sentence structure is also not clear.)

Rephrase: While more than 50 percent men use car to travel to work, the percentage for women is less than 40 percent.

Recreation and visiting town purposes for men were three times more than women trips’ rates about 10%, while the proportion of bank and running errand were a fairly similar about 5% for men, compared to women which their car trips to these purposes accounted about 9% and 10% respectively.

Sentence structure is again not clear. You face problem in linking NUMBERS with the SENTENCE. Let me help you again: The percentage of men traveling by car for recreation was more than three times the percentage of women.
Please restructure your sentences and try again.

On the other hand, the rate of shopping that women doing was just under 20% (Its not the rate of shopping, but the percentage of women traveling by car.), which was more than men who used exactly 10% of their trips on this (10 percent of men travel to shopping locations using a car). Likewise, visiting friends showed around 8% for women to nearly 5% for men, courses also experienced a higher percentage for women than men by almost 5%.

You suffer from sentence structure issues. Learn how to merge data in your answer. Moreover, you misunderstood the meaning at a few places. Bands = 5.5.

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