IELTS Essay Correction: Foreign Language in School

Checking a student’s essay.

Foreign Language.jpeg

All children should study a foreign language in school, starting in the earliest grades. To what extent do you agree and disagree with this statement?

40 minutes, 250 words.

Answer.

Education, as I mentioned earlier in another blog post, is a hot favorite of the IELTS examiners.

Education: Free or Paid?

Children should study a few or all subjects?

Should education be made compulsory?

Teaching styles will change by 2050.

Homework for children.

Financial education in schools.

Children today are not as healthy as in the past. (not on education, but on children.)

Learning how to communicate with people in other countries is very important in the modern world and also we need to speak different languages in order to do this. I strongly agree all children should study an international language, starting from their first day of school. Children are Childhood is the best time to learn foreign languages. (Could have written a better introduction by following an introduction structure.)

Some people object to this learn foreign, arguing that not easily learn other languages. Rephrase: Some people object to learning a foreign language (Statement) since (Reason) it is not easy to grasp an alien tongue without sacrificing a child’s ability to learn mother tongue.

They believe that all children can not take so many different languages because they cannot study their own language. However, there is a counter argument which says that modern technology has made the world (Incomplete sentence. How is this linked to our essay?). A good illustration of this is For example, some children cannot speak there because they cannot well (???) their own mother language.

(Bad paragraph structuring. You could have written much better by following right paragraph structure.)

Although it is hard to compete which some people still prefer to learn a foreign language well, it is the best to start with children. Even though I agree with this idea, children’s brain is made for learning. To give a clear example For instance,  children can learn to speak foreign languages as well as they are a their native language. It is difficult to learn a foreign language quite as well if you start studying it at a later age.

(Bad paragraph structuring. You could have written much better by following right paragraph structure.)

To sum up, I believe that the best way to learn a foreign language is to start study during the first years of school. (The conclusion is too short. Just go through any of my essays in writing task 2 to understand how to conclude an essay.)

Please feel free to ask any questions in the comments section.

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