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IELTS Essay Corrections: Everybody Allowed Admission to College or University.

Correcting a student’s essay.

university education IELTS PTE

Everybody should be allowed admission to university or college programs regardless of their level of academic ability. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

40 minutes, 250 words at least.

Answer:

Education, as I mentioned earlier in another blog post, is a hot favorite of the IELTS examiners.

Education: Free or Paid?

Children should study a few or all subjects?

Should education be made compulsory?

Teaching styles will change by 2050.

Homework for children.

Financial education in schools.

Children today are not as healthy as in the past. (not on education, but on children.)

This question generates a lot of debate because no matter what his and her level of academic ability, everyone should be admitted to university programs.

Opinions are divided on this issue because everyone has the right to an education and one take this way. (How are opinions divided if everyone has the right to education?)

Most people think that everyone should be conceded admission to university or college programs another say to educational that fit education that fits their interests and abilities. I strongly agree with this view.

However, there is a counter argument which says that those who support the view contend that in their opinion (those who support the view = in their opinion; repetition. Redundancy) to go to a university everybody has the right to an education (If everybody has the right to education, it’s not counter argument) and this includes education high school.

(Till now you have written introduction only. This is bad structuring. Essay must have the right proportion of introductionbody, and conclusion).

All though Although it is hard to compete with same people still like better don’t need someone else to tell them what they can do and cannot do. (Okay. This sentence is poorly structured. You need some serious help in writing a good and scorable essay structure and sentence structure. Email me if you are interested in learning this stuff.)

If a person is interested in studying law, to give a clear example for example, it is probably because he or she feels it is something he and she likes and will do well at he will become a better lawyer than any other profession. When students are interested in their program of study, they are motivated.

(You’ve written only one body paragraph. That’s inadequate.)

To sum up, I believe that everyone has the right to an education, already know about the important a university education. I personally agree with the opinion it should not be denied to anyone. (Need to learn the art of writing a conclusion.)

Bands = 5.0 to 5.5

Please feel free to ask any questions in the comments section.

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