IELTS/ PTE Essay Correction: Advertisements Aimed at Children.

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These days many advertisements are aimed at children. What effect do you think they have? Should advertising to children be more controlled and regulated?

IELTS: 40minutes, 250 words at least.

PTE: 20 minutes, 200 to 300 words.

Answer:

Advertisements play a an instrumental role in the development of an industrialist economy. Advertisers make such type of design attractive commercials which have a great greatly influence on innocent and immature children and they get are easily attract attracted toward exquisite products. Hence, pupils adopt unhealthy inappropriate behavior (behavior is never unhealthy. It’s inappropriate.) and unhealthy food items habits. (43 words.)

Firstly, when children see advertisements of certain toys, they get easily fascinated and start demanding them from parents of that products. Parents complete often succumb to fulfill their the child’s wish (a wish is never completed. It is fulfilled.) because they love their child unconditionally. Hence, children become stubborn and materialistic lovers. Secondly, in food advertisements, several junk food items such as burgers, pizzas, and French fries, and sugared products such as candies and chocolates come in market are presented in beautiful wraps. Children see these items in adverts in decorated and animated manner. It looks awesome and delicious so that want to eat these unhealthy eatables Though these products have no nutritional value and contain preseravatives that cause health problems, advertisements present them as delicious and awesome products. Consequently, many children suffer from health-related problems occur in their bodies such as obesity and hypertension(99 words.)

Furthermore, if parents want to protect their children from the adverse affects of advertisements do not affect their children, they would should take many several sustainable steps. Parents They must aware of what children see from on television and the Internet so that their children have are not attracted toward attractive alluring commercials. Moreover, if parents become a little bit strict and give guidelines to the child, children he will understand negative messages of adverts  and leave unreliable advertisements and leave unreliable behaviour(59 words.)

In conclusion, the government should make enact legislation and enforce guidelines for make making simple advertisements of for children products and ban on unnecessary attractive wrappers of vibrant colors so that children do not attract are not attracted toward such appealing appealed products. Similarly, ban on advertisements which are unnecessarily broadcasted on kids channels (incomplete sentence)(46 words.)

Total Words = 247. You have not mentioned anything about regulation. Please do that.

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