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Some people think that teachers are essential to the learning process. Others argue that students at schools and universities learn far more from other sources (such as the Internet and television) than from lessons with teachers.
What are your views on this?
IELTS: 40 minutes, 250 words at least.
While some people believe that educators are cardinal to the learning process
but, (no “but” in while construction) others think that aspirants at schools and educational institutions acquire enormous knowledge from online resources than from lectures with teacher and professors. A combination of both approaches of them (Them refers to people, not ideas) have benefits such as human interaction in classes whereas, and comfort and flexibility in of online learning. (53 words.)
On the one hand,
we (do not use a pronoun without reference of a noun) have direct access to the professors wherein we can discuss about the issues, concepts, and ideas. Rephrase a sentence after removing the pronoun “we”: On the one hand, direct access to teachers and professors allows a student to discuss various doubts, concepts, and ideas.
Furthermore, it provides security to the students that they are associated with a reputed institution. For instance, Finland
is the country which (redundant, meaningless words) has the best education system around the globe and the credit goes to their teachers (why?) and to the pedagogy that they inculcate for teaching. Rephrase: For instance, Finland has the best education system in the world since the country invests heavily in its teachers and education methodology. Finland has improved their the education standards with the help of educators. (78 words. You suffer from sentence structuring issues.)
On the other hand, there are people who take the advantage of the Internet and television to enhance their knowledge. Moreover, they
do the conduct online research and watch educational videos, according to suit their schedule. For example, in the United States, Stanford and Harvard universities started some courses in collaboration with world’s best professors from several institutions named as MOOC’s (Are these techonoly/ online courses? What is MOOC? Do not presume that a reader knows what you know.). Nowadays, technology has been evolved in a certain way that allows everyone to learn new skills. (74 words.)
In conclusion, these two different aspects of learning are welcomed all around the world with certain limitations. Rephrase with DESPITE: Despite certain limitations, these approaches to learning are widely embraced across the world. In future, the Internet and television can change the
way method of learning. However, learners will always need teachers and professors for consultation and discussion which fulfill their human need of for personal interaction. (49 words. Conclusion is well written.)
Total Words = 254 words. Optimum length. Bands = 6.5 to 7.0
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