Answer Checking

IELTS Task 1 Academic Correction: Crime in Newport City.

The chart below shows the changes that took place in three different areas of crime in Newport City Centre from 2003 to 2012.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

rates of crime IELTS.png

20 minutes, 150 words.

Answer:

The given line chart illustrates the changes in the various type of crimes such as burglary, car theft, and robbery in New Port City over a 10 year period from 2003 to 2012 (Mention one time period only).

Overall, it is evident from the graph that in 2003, the burglary was the most prevalent crime which decreased dramatically after one year while the number of the car being stolen increased over the period and became the most occurring crime by the end of 2012. Overall, while the burglary was the most prominent crime from 2003 to 2006, car theft was the most occurring crime since 2007. The incidents of personal robbery remained considerably low were the lowest during this period and remained stable with despite some fluctuations.

Note: Keep the overall paragraph short. Mention MAJOR trends.

In 2003 (Start your paragraph with the noun it will use during the entire paragraph – prefer burglary over year.), the burglary was the crime that occurred the most with an incidence of almost 3500 and it rose to about 3800 within one year and following that it plunged dramatically to above about 1000 in 2008. This rose slightly in 2009 and remained almost stable till 2012 with little fluctuation.

Let us try to rewrite the above paragraph by re-reading the data: 2003 = 3500; 2004 = 3800 (peak); 2008 = a little more than 1000 (about 1100); Thereafter = stable.

Though burglary had the most cases in 2003 and it reached a peak (main feature – no need to mention the number) in 2004, it dropped dramatically and its incidents fell below that of car theft (comparison) to reach 1100 in 2008. Thereafter, it stayed consistently (main feature) at about 1400 incidents per year.

The number of car(This starting is better than the previous one.) being stolen stood around 2800 in 2003 and followed a similar trend of the same trend as that of (required to compare apples with apples) burglary until 2006 reaching around 2000 (The cases of car theft were consistent (main feature) at about 2800 till 2005 and dropped suddenly to the lowest (main feature – no need to mention the number) in 2006.). From this point the number rose standing at to around 2200 in 2007 which followed a marginal decrease in the next year after which there was a gradual increase and it over outstripped burglary reaching around 2700 by the end of 2012 (it outstripped in 2007) (Thereafter it rose gradually during the rest of the period to reach 2700 in 2012).

The number of incidence incidents of the personal robbery was relatively low with just more a little more than 500 in 2003 with little fluctuations remained almost the same figure for 2012. (Need to rewrite this sentence on the lines explained above. Share with me and we’ll discuss this separately. Give it a try.)

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