Answer Checking

IELTS Task 1, Academic Correction: Underground Railway System – 2.

The table below gives information about the underground railway system in six cities.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Screen Shot 2017-07-29 at 10.10.32 PM

20 minutes, 150 words at least.

Answer:

I wrote a sample answer to this question in July 2017. Please go through it HERE.

In this report (no need to write this), I am going to (of course you are. don’t mention.) describe a table that has the information about the underground railway system in 6 six cities (London, Paris, Tokyo, Washington DC, Kyoto, and Los Angeles) (do not use brackets in formal English writing).

The given table (subject) gives (verb) information (object 1) about date opened, kilometers of route, and passengers per year of underground railway systems (object 2) in six cities (object 3).

Overall, the London’s railway system was started earlier was the earliest among all cities about in 1863 and also it has the longest long route of approximately 394 kilometers, whereas, the Kyoto has the shortest route length of only 11 kilometers of route even though it was started in 1981. The Los Angeles’ system, which was started after all the cities railway system in 2001. (understand the placement of a comma. It is used to put a break in the sentence. Your sentence needs continuity. Not break.)

First of all, Tokyo’s railway system has the highest number of passengers per year was about 1927 millions (need not mention the number every time. The question is on MAIN FEATURES, not data.) among all the remaining cities, even though it was opened lately in 1927. Whereas, the number of people travelled traveling through Kyoto’s system was very less is only about 45 million followed by, (no comma here) the city Los Angeles had 50 millions (need not state numbers everywhere. Remember MAIN FEATURES only). The remaining cities London, Paris, and Washington DC had their passengers per year 775, 1191, and 144 million respectively (The question is not “mention data” but “main features”. Moreover, the tense should be PRESENT.).

Sample paragraph highlighting main features: Tokyo’s railway system has the highest (main feature) number of passengers per year among the given railways. This (referencing word) is followed by (main feature) Paris’s and London’s underground railways. The underground railway system of Washington DC carries 144 million per year passengers only. Los Angeles’s system transports only 50 million passengers per annum and Kyoto’s system carries the least number (main feature) of passengers.

Second of all, Paris has 199 kilometers of route, whereas, the other two cities Tokyo and Washington DC have their routes nearly 155 and 126 kilometers respectively. Finally, the Los Angeles has 28 kilometers of route even though it was started after Kyoto, which has only 11 kilometers of route. This is merely stating the numbers, data. Not main features and comparisons. Please rewrite it following the instructions stated above and re-submit.

Follow this blog and like our Facebook page to learn exciting new essays and cue cards. You can contact me HERE.

Please subscribe to my Youtube Channel.

Contact me for writing a polished and effective Statement of Purpose.

Contact me for Editing Services and Document Writing Services.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s