Answer Checking

IELTS Essay Task 2 Correction: Technology Has Changed The Way People Interact – 1.

communication technology IELTS PTE

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Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has the technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your experience.

A similar question appeared in the April 2018 IELTS exam:

In the modern world, it is possible to shop, work and communicate with people via the internet and live without any face-to-face contact with others. Is it a positive or negative development in your opinion? To what extent do you support this development?

40 minutes, 250 words at least.

Here is another student’s answer correction.


A majority of people prefer to communicate with each other by using various types of recent technological advances and inventions rather than face-to-face conversations. Taking into account the impact of the recent tremendous technologic improvements (you’ve already stated this in the opening sentence. Prefer the pronoun THIS), I strongly believe that the relationship concept this has altered the human relationships significantly and will continue to change tremendously both in beneficial and detrimental ways.

On a positive side, after the meeting of technology with technology (??? Makes little sense), advances in technology have made people’s lives easier than ever before. Nowadays, people can get in contact with their friends, relatives, and colleagues via chatting online, sending e-mails and using popular smartphone applications of the smartphones (perfect parallelism!) regardless of the location where they are. Moreover, many people meet their boyfriends and girlfriends with the help of these technologic technology applications by registering to any online dating websites, website (any = singular) . Hence one may be able to date with somebody else without having any idea before physically meeting first. For example, a recent publication conducted during in 2002 in Arizona demonstrated that a whooping 72 percent of the young population preferred the online dating websites on the Internet instead of meeting in person for a new relationship. Taking into consideration of the simplicity of this, it has become more popular and this trend seems that it will continue substantially to do soThe simplicity of these websites coupled with their accessibility has made them popular among today’s youth.

On the negative sides, we can say that (Since you’re writing, you don’t need to mention this) technology decreases the personal contact in relationships. As a result, face-to-face conversations tend to reduce, thus (thus = as a result) this situation may pose a severe risk to the social life in terms of the drawbacks. The availability of new communication technologies can also have the result of isolating people and discouraging the real interaction (this is essentially the first sentence of this paragraph written in different words. Repetition of an idea.)(rephrase: The falling face-to-face conversations pose severe risks of isolating people and lack of cooperation among humans.)

For instance, many young people choose to make friends online via Facebook, rather than mixing with their peers in the real world, and these virtual relationships are a poor substitute for real friendships.

Rephrase of the above paragraph: On the negative side, improvements in communication technologies have resulted in falling face-to-face interactions that pose the risks of isolating people and lack of cooperation among humans (mention the idea in one sentence). According to one study, this phenomenon has increased the incidence of depression and anxiety in the young generation (use the second sentence to explain it a bit.). For instance, a study in Sweden revealed that the young generation has at least 30 percent greater chances of depression than the previous generation due to their inability in sharing emotions with another human resulting from overuse of social media (one or two sentences on the idea.).

In conclusion, I agree the idea that technology has revolutionized the communication between people, but not all of the consequences of this revolution have been positive and socially acceptable. While it has helped us keep in touch with distant friends and family members, it has severely hampered the closeness of relations. (Conclusion should be about 50 words long. 2 sentences at least. Use paraphrasing to express your ideas.)

Bands = 6.5. Please write carefully and follow the structure the way I have written to score 7 bands.

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