Answer Checking

IELTS Essay Correction: Cooking At Home VS Fast Food.

Cutting Vegetables Cook Fruit Woman Hands Cooking

Cutting Vegetables Cook Fruit Woman Hands Cooking

Image Courtesy: Maxpixel

Some people believe that cooking at home is a waste of time. They feel it is better to buy fast food which is more convenient and less stressful in modern life. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion and examples from your own experience.

40 minutes, 250 words at least.

Please go through the SAMPLE ANSWER as well.

Answer:

It is true that cooking requires much time, which people do not have these days. On the other hand (you need on one hand to write this)and fast food is gaining popularity due to its convenience and less stressful nature. But the fact is However, (brevity!) these fast foods cause a substantial amount of harm (remove redundant words and you get collocation) to one’s health, (no comma) besides damaging the homely atmosphere and relationships. (Weel-done! Just a few improvements. Ideas MENTIONED correctly.)

Junk foods include a lot of artificial substances such as emulsifiers and fats, which slowly poisons poison human health by causing many (/ several/ numerous) diseases. These diseases range from diabetes and obesity to heart problems and cancers (good use of range from ….. to construction). Moreover, there are many options available in the market which can be opted for, to avoid eating fast food, such as fruits, vegetables, juices or fresh salad. (need better structuring – discuss with me: Moreover, fast food has numerous healthy alternatives such as fruits, vegetables and fresh salad that are equally convenient and stress-free. Must mention that they are convenient and stress-free to maintain task response.For example, a study conducted by the World Health Organisation in 2015 declares that 72 percent of people who regularly consumed fast food were detected with major health problems than as compared to 18 percent of those who ate fresh fruits and vegetables.

On the other hand, there are homemade foods, (no comma) which do require much time but creates a healthy bond between parents and children, and then passes on as a tradition from generations to generations. (need better structuring using although X, YOn the other hand, although homemade foods require more time for preparation, they create a healthy bond …….) In addition to this, homemade food is more healthy and rich in flavors than fast foods. Therefore giving investing time to it is beneficial to one’s health as well as life and relationships.

In conclusion, although fast food is more convenient and less stressful, consuming it regularly may cause disasters to one’s health. It is very (extremely) important to divert oneself from these kinds of foods and opt for home cooked meals, (no comma) in order to have a healthy and prosperous life in the future.

Total Words = 275. Task response, cohesion is good. Need some improvement in L.R and G.R. Bands = 6.5 to 7.0.

Follow this blog and like our Facebook page to learn exciting new essays and cue cards. You can contact me HERE.

Please subscribe to my Youtube Channel.

Contact me for writing a polished and effective Statement of Purpose.

Contact me for Editing Services and Document Writing Services.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.