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IELTS Writing Task 2 Correction: Friends Through Social Media – 2.

friends social media IELTS PTE

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Many people make friends through social sites and chatroom. Others believe that it is not a good idea to make friends without meeting them face to. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your own opinion and relevant examples.

Please read the SAMPLE ANSWER as well.

Answer:

Due to advent of (there can be advent of technology not technological advancements) technological advancements during the past decade (in the 21st century), it has become more easier to make friends. Nowadays, youngsters spends most of their time on social networking sites for interaction. (Combine the two sentences: With the advent of (emergence of) social media and the internet, youngsters spend more time on social networking websites for making friends.) Although, many people belive in make friends only after few personal interaction, I strongly believe in make friends online since it is not only convenient but also accommodating (this is an adjective that can modify a noun and a pronoun, but not a verb. For example: an accomodating atmosphere of my home.) easy to develop friendship between people of diverse backgrounds.

Nowthesedays Thesedays (Nowadays), social networking sites are the easiest and convenient (You’ve mentioned this in the FINAL sentence of the introduction) way to make friends. (In this body paragraph EXPLAIN the first point you’ve mentioned in the introduction: Convenient) There are several websites, (no comma here) which are specially designed for friendship. For instance, websites such as facebook, whatsapp, twitter, linkedin, instagram, wechat, hike etc, are various online websites through which millions of users stay connected with their friends and relatives everyday, (who can’t modify everyday) who is living anywhere live at distant locations in the world (This sentence lacks context since it is not on NEW FRIENDSHIPS.). For making new friends on these websites, you just simply send a friend request to a person which you like and if that person accepts your friend request, than you both become friends, it . It is like a piece of a cake to make a new friend.

You can create an example for this paragraph. An internet survey has revealed that in 2016 the number of social media friendships have exceeded the number of actual friendships since people find online world more convenient.

Moreover, the most crucial benefit of online friendship is that, we it can act as bridge between two different cultures and avert conflicts. Furthermore, with the help of online interaction we (who are we?) can also understand their (whose?) culture and traditions (the first two sentences mean the same thing.). For instance, a recent online survey conducted by Facebook reveals that 65% percent of total internet user population sends friend request to people who lives live in countries like such as Austalia, America, Canada and Newzealand. This due to the fact that the people really wants to know about each other cultures so that they can compare cultural diiferences.

In conclusion, in todays fast paced world in which we people do not have not enough time to make friends through personal interaction, these websites make it (what does IT refer to?) enable forging friendships possible very easily. Aditionally, in near future, it will be the most cardinal tool to understand the cultural diversity which will lead towards peace and harmony.

Please work on the pronoun usage. A few wrong placements of words and spelling mistakes. Bands = 6.0 to 6.5.

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