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IELTS Essay Correction: Growing Demand for More Flights.

Air travel flights IELTS

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The impact that the growing demand for more flights has had on the environment is a major concern for many countries. Some people believe that one way to limit the number of people traveling by air is to increase the tax on flights.

To what extent do you think this could solve the problem?

40 minutes, 250 words at least.

Answer:

Many nations are worried about the negative consequences of the rapidly increasing use of aviation industry aircraft (the use is not of the industry but of aircraft) on the environment. In this regard, some suggest that levying new taxes on airfare can help reduce the number of people traveling by air. While I disagree with this viewpoint that increased prices (the question is on TAXES, not price. Maintain proper task response.) will effect much effect (adverb-verb) on the number of travelers, I do believe that gathered funds may be useful in solving the environmental issues. (Well written! Mentions topic clearly and use of cohesive devices is good.)

The reason why I believe imposing new tax will not affect much have much influence on the count of air travelers is because traveling by air is generally the privilege of the rich who can afford the exorbitantly high ticket prices of flights. (Idea well stated.) Thus, even if these prices are raised slightly, affluent people would still be able to afford it without much difficulty. To substantiate, although the air prices have had an increase of 30 percent in the last decade, the number of travelers have risen by almost 50 percent. (Idea explained well.) In contrast, mediocre families, who form a little small (countable vs uncountable noun) fraction of air passengers, may choose to travel less by air, if prices are raised. However, I think, it will not have much effect on the whole number total number of people traveling by airplanes.

Nevertheless, I believe the funds raised from increased ticket prices taxes may be beneficial to cope up with the environmental problems. To elaborate, the government may use money from increase in taxes to (missing link. Which fund?) fund scientists for conducting new researches and experiments in order to discover eco-friendly fuels for airplanes which will emit less amount of harmful gases, such as carbon dioxide and nitrogen, into air (Bravo!). Another possible use of the increased prices taxes (How can taxes be used in planting more trees? Missing link. Moreover, the fund generated from an increase in taxes) may be utilized in planting more trees, especially near airports, which will help in absorbing obnoxious gases and loud noise. Thus, this (need a subject) leading leads to a cleaner and greener environment in the long run.

In conclusion, in my opinion, increase in taxes on air travel fare may not lead to a decline in the number of air passengers. However, it can certainly be utilized to tackle the environmental problems by funding new researches research and growing more trees.

You can use IF, THEN clause to express the same ideas in a FUTURISTIC form: In conclusion, I believe that IF airfare is increased appreciably, it will not severely reduce the number of passengers. However, it will certainly create a corpus for investment in afforestation and environment-friendly technologies. This will make earth a more ecologically sustainable place to live. 

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