Answer Checking

IELTS Task 1 Academic Correction: Amount of Leisure Time Enjoyed by Men and Women.

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Answer:

The bar chart compares the total number of leisure time hours per week what that males and females had between 1988 and 1989 1998 and 1999 in terms of (Leisure time can’t be in terms of employment status) their employment status. (Place the object of time at the end of the sentence and rewrite the sentence: …. that males and females of different employment status had between 1998 and 1999.)

NOTE: Please mention “Leisure time in a WEEK”.

Overall, men had greater amount of leisure time in comparison with women in given in three of the five categories (This is a wrong claim since I can’t see data for men in the “employed part-time” category. No men possible in housewives category. However, you’ve written “given categories”.). According to statistics, unemployed and retired people enjoyed more number of leisure hours than working people and housewives.

The full-time employed males were among those categories who had enjoyed least amount of leisure time, about 50 hours per week, still and it was about 10 hours more than their female counterparts. The unemployed and retired males had the greatest amount of leisure time, about 80 hours per week, which was doubled as compared to double of leisure time for working males. There is no data about part-time employed males.

The full- time female employees had the least number of leisure hours, about 35 hours per week, which was almost one half of the amount of time what unemployed and retired women had, which was nearly 70 hours per week (this is obvious.). Housewives had an almost identical number of hours as that of full-time male employees.

NOTE: The structure of your answer is not clear. You should have written two separate paragraphs for inter-group and intra-group comparisons. Please watch the video for more inputs.

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