Answer Checking

IELTS Essay Correction: Younger People Losing Interest in Teaching.

In some countries, younger people are increasingly losing interest in teaching. Why is this happening? What can be done to improve the situation? Give reasons for your answer and include examples from your own experience.

40 minutes, 250 words at least.

Answer:

Please read the sample answer HERE.

Teaching is an essential part of the education process, . Without teachers, education cannot be provided to learners. These days it is noticed that in various countries as youth is lacking lacks (use Simple Present Tense) interest in a teaching career (interest in teaching) because other professional options with good pay packages and other benefits attract them. However, it is significant to take necessary steps to attract youth for teaching profession by various methods. This situation can be altered by offering better remuneration and more autonomy to the teachers.

Note: You’re not properly using THAT as an object of a verb. 

There are myriads reasons which are responsible for rising this problem. The most important is, that there is more success rate and attractive salary packages in other professions as compared to teaching. Consequently, this (what does this refer to?) attract young people when they need to focus on career selection (Consequently, youngsters rarely choose this profession while making a career choice. This refers to teaching). Such as (Difference between such as and for example.For example, engineers and doctors earn more than teachers which helps them to live a luxury life of luxury with full of comforts. (Construct a better example: For example, a recent salary survey in the United States revealed that an average engineer earns at least twice the salary of an average teacher.) Secondly, professions related to the medical and non-medical field have career options in global companies in worldwide. As a result, an employee with medical or non – medical background these backgrounds have more opportunities of for prosperity. For example, several developed countries highly required doctors, nurses, and engineers and hire them with good salary benefits. (The second point is same as the first point. Please add a new point.)

Teaching is connected not only connected with school level, teachers are needed in every sphere of life but also with professions such as doctors and engineers. To illustrate this, to teach doctors and engineers teachers are essential. (this is not an illustration) Needless to say, to motivate youth to teaching teach a profession, essential steps are needed to take for future students (I can’t see a connection with future students). The first and foremost point is attractive pay package in the teaching profession with several benefits and bonus such as paid annual leave etcetera can be fixed. Additionally, to make teaching profession attractive it should be modified with the training teachers of (can’t train technical devices) technical devices and software by and several attractive teaching methodologies. For example, in foreign countries teaching teacher’s trainings are including include software training part of teaching profession (This is not an example. An example needs to be specific: For instance, teachers in Canada are trained not only in the usual course but also in an interactive Microsoft software so that students can learn subjects in an interesting manner.). Hence, These steps will help to promote teaching profession as a good an attractive career option for youngsters career.

In view of the points discussed above, teaching is a very significant profession (None of the points discussed above proves that teaching is a significant profession.). Moreover, to prevent lacking interest of youth in choosing this profession pivotal steps are necessary to take.

In conclusion, if teachers are given proper remuneration and imparted training in latest teaching technologies, youngsters will pursue this as an attractive profession.

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