Answer Checking

IELTS Essay Correction: Necessary for Parents to Attend Parenting Training Course.

It is necessary for parents to attend a parenting training course to bring their children up. 

Do you agree or disagree? 

40 minutes, 250 words at least.

Answer:

Parenting is a major responsibility which is vital for the development of future the upcoming generations. New parents sometimes are in need for training to rear their offsprings in a balanced manner properly. It is generally believed that parenting courses can be of help to enhance the abilities of new parents to raise their children in a balanced way (this is same as the previous sentence. balanced way = properly). I totally agree with this opinion, since bringing up kids is a tough mission and parenting courses can help to get knowledge about the modern ways of raising children especially with being (who is involved in professional life? You never mentioned PARENTS.) so much involved in professional life. (Redundancy in the introduction. Need to eliminate unnecessary words that do not convey any meaning.)

It goes without saying that bringing up children is a hard responsibility (IDEA clearly mentioned in the introduction and stated in the body paragraph). New parents always face problems regarding taking wise decisions in rearing their offspring (You need to explain WISE DECISIONS to make the answer specific. New parents always face problems regarding the appropriate vaccination, nutritious food, and healthy social atmosphere for their child.). Parenting Educational courses train parents to follow rules and regulations especially in difficult situations (What rules and regulations? What difficult situations? You’re being unclear and vague. Please be specific. Leave no scope for interpretation.). For instance, how to punish a child for a wrong behavior without a violent action or abuse. (Better write: Parents need to learn the subtle art of changing the negative behaviours of a child without being violent or abusive.)

Moreover, these courses are of great value for parents who are so much engaged in their professions to fulfill the needs of their kids lacking the time to recognize their issues (You’ve tried to club two ideas – professions and lacking time for kids without a proper connecting device. Consequently, the sentence structure is weird. Note the three connecting devices. Moreover, since parents are extremely busy in their professions and lack time to spend with their children, these courses can offer immense value.). Parenting training courses can illustrate warning signs to detect problems of youngsters and how to tackle these issues any problem to solve(Can you specifically write about warning signs and problems of youngsters?)

Another important point to be mentioned is that these courses give care for provide knowledge about the psychological factors affecting children in different life stages. Trained behavior is needed to deal with immature thinking of a teenager for instance(Please explain this further. IELTS wants properly developed ideas.)

In conclusion, parenting courses play a vital role in raising an offspring to give practical instructions for parents who have tight little time to understand the psychological factors rendering their children vulnerable to serious risks.

NOTE: This essay needs proper development of ideas with SPECIFIC inputs.

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