Answer Checking

IELTS Essay Correction: People Affected by Social Media and the Internet.

Nowadays people are affected by social media and the internet. Is it a good or a bad development in your opinion?

40 minutes, 250 words at least.

Answer:

Undoubtedly, social media along with the internet has positively transformed our lives in comparison to the past by bridging the communication gap between the people and by providing up-to-date information about the outer world. I believe it plays they play an instrumental role in making our lives comfortable a bed of roses.

Social networking sites and the web have revolutionized the way people socialize with each other (have given new heights to the way people communicate) with the help of WhatsApp and Facebook applications which are very economical and easy to use. (HOW? Explain. These technologies have made communication extremely easy and convenient. People can not only talk to each other but also make video calls and conference calls. They can also share pictures, videos, and music with their friends as well as professional acquaintances.Moreover, social media has proved to be an online platform for sharing information regarding the current happenings in politics, economics, and sports. (HOW? Explain. The moment an event occurs, someone takes a picture or record a video and share it on these platforms. Social media websites and online news websites are updated every few seconds with information about the world around us.) Online shopping and payment of bills has not only reduced the traffic jams on the road but has also made our lives hassle-free because we can go shopping online and can pay the bills by just one click. (Lack of explanation will seriously hamper your score.)

These platforms have also empowered certain sections of society to stay productive and make significant contributions to the economy. (You’ve explained your point but missed the IDEA.) The internet has made it possible to do office work without being physically present at the office as all the data is available and stored online, which .  This has proved as a boon to the new mothers as they can take care of their newborn babies and they can also earn money. Furthermore, the internet have has given a new height to expanded the reach of distance education because teleconferencing provision aids learning in the far-flung areas which are otherwise devoid of schools and colleges. (Missed the IDEA: These technologies have also expanded the reach of education to hitherto unreachable geographies. The internet has allowed distance education of youth in remote areas through online modules of universities such as Harvard and enhanced skills of people in these areas through websites such as Youtube, Udemy, and Edx. For example, some hilly and remote regions of the Himalayas in India do not have schools and colleges. However, the youths in these areas have access to the Internet and they use it to learn various marketable skills.)

In conclusion, I firmly believe that social media and the internet have myriad / inevitable benefits for us and it is hard to imagine present-day life without them.

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