Answer Checking

IELTS Essay Correction: Advantages and Disadvantages Of Consumer Goods – 1.

Nowadays, more and more people are using consumer goods such as refrigerators and washing machines. Are there more advantages or disadvantages to this? Give your own opinion and examples.

40 minutes, 250 words at least.

Answer:

Refrigerator and washing machines and many other such consumer goods have replaced the need for of physical labor (1) for completing our daily errands. In my opinion, the introduction of these consumer appliances in our daily lives has been more advantageous. 

1. Do not compare Apples with Oranges. Consumer goods can’t replace need. They can replace physical labor.

One big of the biggest advantage of using these appliances is are (ONE = singualar) the considerable amount of time that they save for us. For instance, washing dishes in a dishwasher is much more time saving than physically doing it. The time thus saved can be employed for productive activities. (Let us complete the argument by mentioning the benefit of the saved time.) Another advantage, (no comma) that these machines offer is that they allow us to multi-task. So while one washes clothes in a washing machine, they can also simultaneously prepare the ingredients for a meal with the help the a mixer grinder. This enables a person to complete all tasks on time. (Let us complete the argument by mentioning the benefit of multi-tasking.)

You’ve done a good job in developing the arguments in a very specific manner. Since this paragraph is about benefits, please close each point with the final benefit (of time saved and multi-tasking).

One would argue that However, the advent of these machines has made us overly dependant on them and led to increase in many physical problems like joint pains, obesity, and lethargy. (You’ve clearly mentioned the idea. But, instead of explaining it, you’re offering a solution. This paragraph is about the disadvantages. Explain the disadvantages only.) (2) But to deal with these problems individuals need to be self-aware. We need to ensure that enough movement and exercise is given to the body so that the aforesaid problems don’t set in. Having said that I feel that blaming the lethargy of our bodies on the use of appliances would be unfair. (You can’t say that. This is not “advantages-disadvantages” essay. This is an opinion essay. If you think there are no disadvantages, do not write them.)

2. Over-reliance on appliances such as washing machines has reduced our physical workout. Earlier humans used to wash clothes and cut vegetables with hands. This helped in the development of muscles and maintained our physical strength. Now, we do not need to make any physical effort to do any household activity. One medical study has pointed out that we do not need to go to a gym if we abandon machines and carry out all our regular activities by ourselves.

To sum up, I would say that home appliances have made human life much easier and efficient than it was before. However, there is always a downside of any new development and the same applies to these appliances. But at the end of the day the advantages which these machines bring to the table when at one’s disposal are anytime more than the disadvantages attached to them.

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