Answer Checking

IELTS General Task 1 Correction: Advertisement In Newspaper.

You saw an advert in the newspaper asking for volunteers to help run a charity event. Write a letter of application to the organizers, in your letter:

  • Explain why you are interested in helping.
  • Give details of the suitable past experience.
  • Suggest ways you might help with the event.

Answer:

Dear Sir,

I recently got to know learned about the requirement of for volunteers, to assist in running a charity event, from an advertisement in the Times of India newspaper. I am willing to enroll my name for the same as I have had a similar experience (It seems that you HAD an experience in the past. It started in the past and ended in the past. You do not have it NOW.) and I have numerous ideas to support the event. (I have ample experience in this domain and would like to work with your organization.)

The introduction is well structured. You’ve expressed an interest in the job in your original style (non-mechanical way of writing).

I am pursuing a graduate diploma in social services. Currently, we have holidays for 2 months. So, I want to devote my time volunteering for social, non-profit events which can act as an internship and help in my course studies.

We were taught (WE does not refer to anything.) During the diploma, I have learned about various charity and non-profit events in our curriculum which include theory as well as practical sessions such as volunteering to donate food and clothes to the people when Earthquake a massive earthquake hit Nepal in the year 2016. I have also participated in the weekend charity campaigns to donate sweaters to poor people during winters.

My friends and I can help with the event by conducting a drive in my college to raise funds for donation to the poor. I will also help to run a campaign to educate citizens on how society can to help poor earn meaningful livelihood sustain the poverty. (sustain poverty = maintain poverty = do not let them raise their income and rise above poverty. I’m sure you do not want to convey this message.) I would be happy to meet and discuss the above approaches.

I am looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours Sincerely,

V.

The letter is well written with clear paragraph structuring. However, there is enough scope to improve sentence structure and write better words to convey the idea.

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