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IELTS Essay Correction: Teach Children Literature And History.

Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature and history of their own country, rather than the literature and history of other countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

40 minutes, 250 words at least.

Answer:

The advent of the internet, along with globalization, make has made (1) it possible for people to learn the culture and writing skills (2) literature and history all around the world without geographic limits. Some people think that children should focus on their own traditions, (traditions are not the same as history. LR.) while I would argue that they also need to know the literature and history from other countries.

1. Is the subject singular or plural? Well, when you use ALONG WITH – it depends on the first noun. My brothers along with me = Plural subject (brothers); I along with my brothers = Singular subject (I). Here, the only subject is ‘advent of the internet’. It is singular.

2. Culture is not the same as history. It is just a part of history. Similarly, writing skills are not the same as literature. It is just a part of the literature. Do not change the MAIN NOUNS of a question. LR.

Literature and history are important for our understanding of the world around us. While some people think that only local knowledge of these areas (domains/ subjects) is necessary, I think children also need to grasp global information in these domains.

Learning different cultures (that’s not history. LR and TR. But you can connect history and culture as I have done below.) makes it possible for children to better understand people or articles (what does this mean? Vague. LR.) books, magazines and newspaper articles from other parts of the world. (Learning a foreign language, reading its novels (= literature) and understanding its historical events, enables children to better understand that country’s culture.) Due to cultural diversity, they should be are open-minded after entering the workforce, especially when working in an international company. For example, they need to face (interact with) customers from different historical backgrounds and work with a bunch of people who have diverse customs. If they have no idea about these, it is hard for them to get along well with each other when they work together communicate effectively (Use optimum words to express precisely and concisely. LR.); this may also adversely affects their work (professional) performance of the work adversely. (Most effective placement of words. Place adverbs – adversely – before a verb – affects.Moreover, as different countries have different writing patterns, children need to learn the structure and collocations in order to understand articles writing newspaper articles in other foreign languages. For instance, if they want East Asian children want to know the latest international business news, they need to master English which is the lingua franca in the world so that they can watch CNN and BBC or read The Guardian and The Wall Street Journal. (Your response is too general. Let us write a bit more specifically.) Therefore, children should learn the literature and history from other countries, which are useful in working and keeping in touch with the world.

Although absorbing information from other countries is crucial, children cannot ignore their own cultures. They normally spend most of the time in their homeland and they need to have a good thorough understanding of local history and have an excellent writing skills in their mother tongue (missing context) in order to go to a university. For example, famous universities do not only need high marks but also a few well-structured and content essays written after extensive research. (How does this example relate to the local literature and local history? – 3) This means that children should represent their ability to handle enormous literature tasks in tertiary education.

3. For instance, many Chinese universities demand excellent command over Mandarin language and Chinese history from ancient to modern times. Consequently, parents and teachers thoroughly train children in these domains during secondary school.

In conclusion, children should learn writing skills and history from their own country as well as from other countries as long as they want to be successful in the future.

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