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IELTS Essay Correction: Leadership Skills – Innate Or Learned?

Some people believe that individuals are born with leadership skills. Others say that these skills can be developed with experience. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Answer:

Some people argue that leadership qualities are innate in human beings, while others believe that it (IT can’t refer to qualities.) they can be generated later on with the learned/ acquired through experience. Though some children get leadership skills inherited from parents, some individuals can generate them by gaining knowledge. (This sentence delivers the same message as in the previous sentence. It does not add value. Rather, this counts as repetition.) I support the latter view.

Some people argue that leadership qualities are innate in a few individuals as these are transmitted from parents to children through genes. (Sentence 1 with reason) Others think that they can be acquired through experience in business, social work, or politics. (Sentenec 2 with reason) I support the latter view.

Young ones generally get similar genes as of their parents and, thus, some of them are inborn leaders. (1) Owing to heredity, the capabilities of parents are often (why often? They are always transmitted.) transferred to offsprings. It is also proved by the medical science that characteristic and behavior of parents are usually carried on to their future generations. (This sentence conveys the same idea as expressed in the previous sentence. Use every sentence wisely to develop your argument.) For example, In India, the son of the chief minister of Punjab, Sukhbir Singh Badal was born with the leadership skills as he can could easily lead the a group, manipulate people to adopt changes like culture and rituals even during his school days.

1. You’ve jumped to conclusion in the first sentence (thus, some of them ….). Before coming to the conclusion, EXPLAIN the idea in a logical manner. Note the order in the following sentences: Genes —> Parents —-> Children. Genes, which store hereditary information, are transmitted from parents to children. If the parents have leadership qualities such as patience, the children inherit them through genes. (What if parents are leaders?) If the parents are short-tempered, anxious, or lazy, their kids inherit the same attitude and they fail to become leaders. (What if parents are NOT leaders?)

On the other hand, I support the view that leadership skills can be developed gradually with experience. By working hard towards the aim and devoting the entire time in to work, individuals can (why add uncertainty?) attain complete knowledge and understanding. Therefore, they would be are able to act as a leader and solve the problems of people while those who have inborn leadership qualities often fail to apply these skills. For instance, Mahindra Singh Dhoni, former captain of the Indian Cricket Team, worked hard for nearly five years with full determination, and, finally, he was declared as the best leader the team could ever have had(I can’t see the name of any leadership quality in this example. Be more specific. Think about the leadership qualities a person can learn. Patience, sacrifice, hard work, motivation, etc.)

For example, Mahendra Singh Dhoni, the former captain of the Indian cricket team, learned the leadership qualities of patience and determination through years of hard work. Eventually, while the sons of former captains of the Indian cricket team were not even selected to play for India, he was declared as the best leader the team could ever have.

In conclusion, many people are inborn leaders due to the qualities inherited from parents and they are not required to struggle for achieving success. However, some individuals can develop these skills by working hard.

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