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IELTS Essay Correction: Learn Foreign Language For Travel Or Work.

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Answer:

You’ve written a LONG essay. This will consume a lot of precious time and expose more mistakes.

It is being said that the sole purpose of learning a non-native language is either travelling to other countries or to earn earning (Parallelism: earning is parallel to travelling.money, however, others say these are not the only reasons. (Not only is this clause unnecessary but also the usage of HOWEVER is incorrect. Can you guess why?) Although an alien language facilitates communication with natives of other countries and increases cultural understanding gets to know about them, (1) I believe that the passion to learn about other cultures and history is also a crucial reason behind this. (Wrong use of ALTHOUGH. It is used to express contrast with in an idea. Let’s say, the idea is about “economic growth”. ALTHOUGH can be used to express one positive and one negative about economic growth. “Although economic growth leads to job creation, it is harmful for the environment.”)

1. Loss of logic. “Alien language facilitates ….. and alien language gets ……”. Is alien language KNOWING them? That does not make sense.

The reason why people People intend to learn a foreign language is either to communicate with their staff members at work or to talk with people of the host another country, as said by some. (A number of unnecessary words that do not add any value to the sentence.) This means, (There is no need to write this. Obviously, the second sentence explains the first sentence.) if they do not know the language of the country where they are working then it would , it will (2) be difficult to convey the message smoothly. Also, when travelling to other countries, knowing their language is of utmost importance because if someone gets stuck in an unknown place then he or she can ask for help from the people living there. In India, for example, 46% of the people who are travelling travel to Canada in search of greener pasture or as a tourist, (Once you’ve written travel, it includes work and tourism.) enroll themselves in the French language learning courses, which shows that language plays a profound role while visiting to foreign countries so that they can communicate flawlessly with French-Canadians in Ottawa and Montreal. (The example is incomplete. Why do they learn French?) Nonetheless, I think these are not the only factors for learning a new language as many people do so to know about others customs and traditions.

2. No need to write THEN in an IF-THEN construction. Use a comma instead. Correct construction: “IF (present tense)…… , ….. (future tense)”.

Having said that, (3) learning a new language learning can also be done out of passion to learn about understand (word repetition – learnother cultures and their past events. This is to say, (Same point as mentioned in BP 1.) people learn non- native language (You’ve already written – learn a new language – in the previous sentence. Don’t write it again.) to It (refers back to ‘learning a new language’) helps people study the historical archives and the way of living lifestyle of foreigners people since most of the records are written in regional language of a particular area. (REGIONAL = particular area.) In Punjab, a state in India, many foreigners come to learn the Punjabi language so that they can study the rich culture and tradition of the local inhabitants, one (You can’t connect two separate ideas/ clauses/ sentences through a comma.) . One such remarkable example is of a Canadian man, Stephen Gucciardi, who speaks (subject-verb disagreement) fluent Punjabi and have has (subject-verb disagreement) studied a lot about the Sikh culture. I would like to reinstate that people not only learn new linguistics for professional growth and travelling but also as a urge to know more about others’ heritage(This counts as a repetition.)

3. Wrong modifier. A modifier conveys information about the noun with which it is attached. So, “having said that” modifies “a new language”. Can a new language SAY something? No. “Having said that, I explained the consequences of the policy.” Note that in this sentence “having said that” correctly modifies “I”. “I” can say something. “New language” can’t.

In conclusion, I would reiterate that professional reason profession is not the only factor for learning a new language, p (You can’t connect two separate ideas/ clauses/ sentences through a comma.) . People who have a passion to learn about other civilizations can also do so. (In conclusion, people learn foreign languages for professional reasons as well as for passion to learn about other civilizations.) I would recommend that more resources should be available to learn other languages them (use a pronoun to refer back to ‘foreign languages‘ in the previous sentence.) for personal and professional growth.

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