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IELTS Essay June 2021: People Above 65 Should Not Work.

Many people believe that individuals over 65 should not be allowed to continue working. Others think that people should be allowed to work for as long as they choose. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Answer:

The ability of the elderly to perform professional tasks efficiently is a hotly debated issue. (Opening statement) While (While X, Y construction) some people think that those above 65 years of age should continue working so that (Connecting device – cohesion) organisations can benefit from their experience, others believe that their (referencing device – cohesion) ability to think and act is extremely low and they lack zest for work. (MENTION the reasons supporting each view) I support the former view.

Businesses can immensely benefit (collocation – LR) from the experience of the elderly staff. (Opening sentence connecting with the introduction. Now EXPLAIN it in the subsequent sentences.) While working for decades in professional capacity, (Introducer) they (Referencing device – Elderly staff) acquire (construction: “acquire X and Y” – Cohesion.) knowledge of operations and thorough understanding of system which (connecting device) enables them to make the right decisions. (Further EXPLAIN this sentence with an EXAMPLE) For example, while a young banker is energetic, the elderly one has the insight to identify whether an industrialist seeking a huge loan has the ability to pay back the debt. He can not only (“Not only X, but also Y” construction) read the books better than the youngsters, but also make an assessment of the character and intention of the loan seeker. These abilities can only be gained with age and experience.

Despite the aforementioned benefits of those above 65 years of age, (Connect between the two paragraphs – Cohesion) some organisations have a policy of retirement at this age. (EXPLAIN why retirement is necessary at this age) Numerous scientific studies (collocation) have concluded that humans lose their memory as the age advances and there is a significant deterioration after that age of 65. (Elaborate on “significant deterioration of memory” in the next sentence. This will complete the IDEA.) The ability of the retired people to retain numbers is less than 50 percent of those in the age group of 30 to 45. (This is a SPECIFIC example – TR.) Also, these people have little energy and enthusiasm to act and this adversely impacts businesses. (Elaborate in the next sentence.) Construction companies, invariably, prefer a worker who can build fast so that project timelines can be met.

In sum, even though it is true that people above the age of 65 suffer from memory and energy issues, I think their systemic insights must be used by businesses. While they can not be used in the roles of hard physical labour, they are indispensable for making the right decisions.

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